Words of Wisdom
Updated 7/1/2008

How to Succeed in School

   You know what they say about first impressions, right? You only have one chance to make one. And this is completely unfair, but you also know what they say about life. It's unfair.  There's a flip side to this injustice is It can work in your favor. All you need to know is how to communicate, both in what you say and with what you do. It sounds simple--but of course, it isn't always so easy.
   Kids today know a lot of stuff--it's just different stuff from what their parents and grandparents know. Kids are generally much smarter about using technology. Ask any parent and you'll probably hear, "Yeah, my kid knows way more about computers than I do."  So, if kids are so smart, then why is going back to school so hard? It's because there are two groups of people that kids need to impress: their teachers and their peers.
   Quite often, what makes a good first impression with one group doesn't go over so well with the other. For example, while a student would look at a midriff-baring T-shirt and think, "She's got a nice innie," a teacher will look at it and think, "She's got a lot of nerve showing up to my class dressed like that."
   It goes beyond clothes, of course--there's what you say and how you say it. And since you have about one minute to make your first impression, you might as well do it right.    So what's a student to do? Easy. Follow these four tips on how to dress, how to talk, how to win the teacher over ... and how to be successful with that first impression.

  1. Dress like you mean business
Specifically, don't dress to impress your friends. You don't need to. They're worried enough about impressing you.   A kid's attempt to make a fashion statement often goes over the top. It is this sort of thing that cracks adults up--and not in the way you want.  Ask yourself this, "what am I trying to say with the way I dress?  What message am I sending?"  The message you you may be sending is that you don't have a clue about your image and you've lost touch with reality.

   2. Be a kid, but talk like a teacher
Boys often use slang words which they think are cool.  However the teacher may not know what the slang means and their impression of your slang words may be that you are trying to be a smarty.  Thats not the first impression you want to make.
Boys aren't the only ones to do goofy things. Many girls--and lots of women, too--make an unfortunate habit of ending sentences with a question mark. Even when they're not asking a question. It sounds like this:
"So I was at the bookstore? And this guy? He came up to me? And I was like...." Ugh.
Young women often end sentences with question marks because other young women do it--and they want to sound like their peers.  The underlying psychology of the practice is to encourage a response. What it actually does is show insecurity (or wimpiness), even though that is not the intention.

Don't let your clothes or your speech patterns say something you don't want to be saying.

   3. How to win the teacher over (and get good grades)
The secret here is to neither suck up to the teacher, nor focus on grades. Yeah, I know. Parents and teachers make it sound like grades are the Most Important Thing Ever.  Not so.  Grades are important, but not the most important.  What is most important is what you learn.   Don't worry about a school subject being hard. You will be able to learn it.  Don't be afraid to ask questions.  If you are embarassed to ask in class, wait till after class and then ask the teacher in private.  This shows you care about what the teacher is teaching and that will impress them.

  4. Good first impression
Psychology tells us that within the first minute that you meet someone, you will make an impression on them that will last longer than any other time within your relationship.  So here is what you do:
1. Dress like you mean business.  Teachers have seen goofy dressers before that they are not impressed by them.
2. Speak like you know how.  Speak as if you are educated.  All teachers have talked with goofy speaking students before and they are not impressed by them.
3. Smile.  Act as if you are happy to be there.  If the teacher offers their hand for a handshake, do so with a firm grip, not a crushing grip, and continue to smile.
4. Don't be afraid to ask questions.  By asking questions you show the teacher that you care about what they have to offer.

In addition: How to be happy in school:
Lots of kids find things they really like to do in school, but they don't do them, because their friends aren't doing them, or because their parents tell them it's a waste of time because it is not a good way to make money. If there's something you really like to do (music, drama, sports, clubs), go for it.  You can learn while having fun.

Nuff Said,
Larry C. Ingram, ME, USN-Ret

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Words of Wisdom
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